Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Man's Best Friend and Worst Enemy

Man's best friend: The Canine, and worst enemy: Carlos Ray Norris, together as a team. Shaggy's got a badge and a nose for heroin. Chuck loves shaggy. He hates injustice.

Monday, August 23, 2010

Norris in the Forest

Chuck dismounts his steed and attempts to track down a fugitive. He takes a whiff of these condor wings for any possible fragrant evidence then stoically stares off into the distance, pondering his next move. Not a good sign for the fugitive.

Friday, August 20, 2010

Charles in Charge

We get a lot of real Americans on this website, but this takes it to a whole new level. Over the past decade, Sir Charles Norris of 'Merica has become an internet phenom. We don't plan to stop that here at Crouchpics. On this particular day, the Ranger finds the nearest manhole cover as to not muss up his boots, loads his pistol and scopes out a drug ring's warehouse from afar. The icy look in his eyes foresees less than zero mercy for at least 25 men. If any women are involved, they will be spared. However, they will have to apologize and will be promptly taken out to a steak dinner.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Black Belt Squatter With an Upside Down Daughter

This Kung Fu Master uses a croc-wearing toddler to taunt his enemy. The outfit definitely suggests bad guy. He has kidnapped the protagonist's daughter. Little does he know what he is in for when our hero arrives...In 2 days via a trifecta of absolutely heroic and American Crouchpics. Stay tuned.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Perching Sensei

Sensei Brian demonstrates a stealthy sneak attack to his students in front of the Dojo outhouses at Karate Camp

Monday, August 16, 2010

Graveyard Highlander

There can only be one. This astral, time traveling warrior couches in front of the graves of all the orks and ghouls he's murdered.

Friday, August 13, 2010

Double Eagle USA Champion #1

This familiar golfing croucher has almost too much dedication to the crouch cause, and we love it. Most men and women subjects would be content with settling for par: a sufficient, family golf pose, simply conforming to the stiff, rigidity by standing to the right or left of his or her triumvirate of familial elders and thus contributing to the colossal mountain of bland photographs. Not this man. By the bend of a knee he heroically saves this snapshot from an insipid, obscure, photographic purgatory and launches it further than his best drive, into an elite, championship, country club, photographic heaven. Hole in one my friend. Get this man a green jacket and a trophy. He is a true champion

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

The Foggy Tan Man

Every single thing in this picture is tan except the Tevos and the wrist watch. Even this guy's personality is tan

Slicky McUntuck

There is a 65% chance this stylish fellow works at a cell phone stand in a mall. It would explain his shiny white sketchers from Journeyz and his fake Rolex which he proudly displays via classic hand clasp.

Friday, August 6, 2010

Squatham City

The caped crusader getting lower than his throaty growl. If you are a bad guy or a henchman, nothing good can come from this.

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Born To Crouch

There is a reason he's called "The Boss." This is the reason.